My Curly Hair

So here is my very curly hair coming back.  It does seems to be coming out but I am hoping it is because of the change from winter to spring.  I seem to go through loosing some hair that time of year.  It will grow extremely slow while I am on chemo and it sure is.

What? Not again!

Ok....so......my HAIR is FALLING OUT AGAIN.  Dog gone it. Take a deep breath.  Enough said.

Great day to be alive!

I am sooooo happy today:  Let me tell you why:

Friday, April 18, I met my new Family Doctor for the first time. Kim and I really liked him a lot.  He spent 1 1/2 hours with me that day.  Kim went with me to see what he thought of him.  We both were completely sold on him. He was so supportive of me with all the stuff he will be treating me for, especially my cancer. It was a great appointment.

Today, 4 days later, I went to see my oncologist.  I haven't seen her for 2 months, and she was glad to see us again.
2 good things:
1.  My blood was great.  Nothing out of the ordinary
2.  She said I am doing great. And no CT scan for 3 or 4 more months! 

I haven't had a CT scan since Christmas but she doesn't feel I need to have another for quite some time.  She made the comment that I have been coming to her now for almost a year. I told her that by my first oncologists opinion, I should almost be dead.  Then Kim, (cough), said, (cough, cough):  "He is a horses ---". I looked at him like, "what did you just say"?
My doctor peeked around her computer at him with this surprised look like, "did you just say what I think you did"? We both were staring at him for just blurting that out. I felt like saying, "Kim......tell us how you feel about him, why don't you?" Then my doctor started laughing.  She started trying to give us that other doctors point of view those 11 months ago, and why he would say the things he did.  After she was through talking, Kim said. " He's still a  butthead. I will now shut my mouth". We both were laughing.

Anyway....I am so thankful for today.  I feel even more certain than I did before that I am doing  good, and that I need to make goals and plans for my life more than just a few months in advance.  

She helped me today with some of the things happening to me from the chemo, but told me that I am lucky.  Most people have such worse things to go through.  I was so in agreement.

Anyway, I feel on top of the world today!  Woo hoo! I am loving life!!!!!  

Health update....... Lots of "Ouches".

I have been extremely blessed to have not needed to see my oncologist only once so far in the past three and a half months.  I see her again in a couple of weeks, which I am sure she will get me another cat scan appointment.  It will have been 4 months by then.

I don't know if  it is the length of  time spent on chemo, or if my cancer is getting worse.  I only know that I am feeling much more affected by the chemo.  My poor tongue feels like it has been badly burnt, everywhere.  It is so hard to chew anything crunchy or anything chewy.  Anything remotely spicy or hotter than very lukewarm sends me through the roof. I feel like I have to chew like I am a child learning how to chew solid food.  I have to gingerly move the food around in my mouth and I feel self conscious now of people watching me eat.

Yesterday and today have been crippling.  The bottoms of my feet hurt enough that I can't walk well. I have had to wear socks the last few months around the house from the tenderness of my feet, but now it seems nothing seems to help.  My palms also have gotten more severe, and there are quite a few things I can't do now with my hands.  It has been frustrating.

I also have felt very very tired.  By noon some days, I am ready for a nap, and I feel a dramatic difference in my strength.  I feel weak.  I am having a harder time lately.

My blood pressure has gotten really high the last few weeks, which has made it necessary to find me another family doctor to replace our previous one who died the end of December.

I have looked forward for conference to buoy me up.  I don't want to complain and be a Debbie Downer.  That is for sure.  If I start acting like that, will somebody kick my butt!

Hey....a good thing though!  My hair is growing more, but because of the curls, it looks shorter.  But as soon as it gets warmer, I may try to go out with no hat or wig.  I was able to color it darker so it isn't white (or orange) and it looks thicker now.  The top front is still really sparse.  But getting hair back is making me happy.