Diagnosed with Cancer 6 1/2 months ago

I was diagnosed with cancer 6 1/2 months ago.  By my first oncologists time line for me......I have 5 1/2 months left to live, and I don't even look sick yet!  Hum.  I think he rattled our family carelessly.  My blood tests come back every 2 weeks not much different than the month before.  Not to say that prayers of you all haven't helped me immensely.  They have.  They have also helped me emotionally.  I don't believe what that doctor said to me that day, but it has been hard to erase that comment from my mind.  I think I have to get really ill looking and feeling, before kicking the bucket.  I have a long way to go to get to that point.......thankfully! In fact, I tell myself.... maybe I don't really have cancer.  Maybe its all a big mistake!!!!  ;)  Don't I wish!

The NO HAIR look

I guess I don't even need to explain this picture.  I finally dared put it up.  It is part of my illness, and I need to document it.

Yesterday, at work, one of my co-workers had me go online and see the Utah girl who just won a beauty pageant and she was bald. She is getting national attention.  She said she could have worn a wig, but she was being judged on beauty and not on her hair, and she won!  I am not a beauty by no means, but this is who I am right now, and that story gave me the courage to put this on.

4 NEXIVAR!

I get to take all 4 of my Nexivar......FINALLY! 
My blood pressure is finally normal.  I am finally going to have my full dose after waiting 3 1/2 months!  Those cancer cells are gonna die!

A new hair color!!!!!!!!!!!

Ok! I guess I can be a little mad/ grumpy about this.  If I can't, I am anyway.

I was told by my hairdresser, that most times when women loose their hair  during chemo, that it comes in differently than it was before.  So I was aware I may have some change in my hair.

Well, I initially had it shaved the first of September.  As my hair started growing back, I could see my normal hair color and texture coming back.  I would always keep checking it out closely, even though it was only a half inch or so.... But it looked like my normal hair.

I had it shaved again a few weeks ago.  AND IT IS NOT MY SAME HAIR COMING BACK IN! It is almost pure WHITE!  And VERY CURLY!  I have WHITE CURLY HAIR!! My gosh!  I thought I have been imagining it the last week or so, since my head is so light.  The darker hair was not coming through.  And it looked liked it was fuzzy white!  I finally said something to Kim tonight about how my hair is coming in differently.  He said he had noticed it also that it looked so light and he thought it looked curly!  SO I AM NOT IMAGINING IT! It isn't gray.  IT IS WHITE!  AND YES I AM THROWING A MINI TANTRUM! I am not ready for this change too!!!! Dag-nabit!

(Woo hoo for hair color)

(Ok, my daughter, Emily just called and I let out my frustration on her.  She had a marvelous idea!  She told me to shave it a third time, and maybe it will come in red!) hahahahaha

My physical symptoms from cancer or chemo.

I have had several people ask me how I am feeling, and what are my symptoms?  Here is what is happening on a daily basis:

My hair is still falling out.  Maybe it will continue until it is all gone.  I don't know.

The palms of my hands and bottoms of my feet are red and are very heat sensitive.  They are quite sore most of the day.  I have to wear socks since my feet are too sensitive to walking barefoot. With my hands, they are too sore to unscrew bottles, or do things that require pressure to my hands.

My tongue is also very sore all of the time.  Even toast is hard to chew because it hurts.  It is also very heat sensitive and I have to have my food cooled way down.

High blood pressure and headaches a lot.

Bloating and abdominal pain occasionally.

My knees hurting

I feel so lucky that is all I have!  It could be soooooo much worse.  I can handle those things. I thank my Father in Heaven all the time that I don't have worse symptoms.